I have a question.  It seems I have been given some dreams that seem to be too real for dreams, life-like.  In one of them, I am facing demonic activity to the point of them wanting to possess me.  I am a man of faith and even fight back in this sleep state.  I start to pray really hard in tongues even in these so-called dreams.  I do fight them off, but they seem to be persistent.  Personally, I do fight them off from the Scripture and also by praying in tongues.  This seems so weird to be doing this while I am so-called “dreaming” these things.  I just want to know if others have had this type of experience.  I have had other visions of certain areas of hell also.  If what I have seen is real, my hardest reality in dealing with this vision is that I cannot do anything to help these souls I have seen in torment, a torment like I know I would not want anyone to face.

I thought about asking my pastor about this, but I hate to say this, I am afraid of being classified as being a little mentally unstable.  I know as a Holy Ghost-filled Apostolic CHRISTIAN, I should know better.

Sincerely,
Labeled As ‘Mentally Unstable’

Dear Labeled As ‘Mentally Unstable’,

The days of dreams and visions have passed.  In the past, God spoke to various people through dreams, visions, and prophecy, but today, He speaks to us through His Son, Jesus Christ (Heb 1:1-2).  Now that we have the complete and perfect Bible – there is no need for God to give people individual dreams or visions (1 Cor 13:9-10).  It is through the Word of God that we learn how to live faithfully (Rom 10:17).  So don’t worry about your dreams, as vivid as they are; they aren’t a message from God.  Feel free to read “I Dreamed A Dream” and “Three Cheers For Miracles” for an in-depth look at what the New Testament says about speaking in tongues, dreams, and prophecy.

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A while back, I wrote to you and told you about a problem I was having repeating bad things against God in my head.  It went away for a while, and now it has gotten worse.  I got paranoid that I had blasphemed the Holy Spirit, and I started to look up on the internet what it meant.  I became obsessed with it, and it seemed like I was on the computer everyday.  There were people on there that were saying good things and horrible things about it.  My problem is that I repeated those things in my mind, and the Bible says there is no forgiveness for that.  I did so much that now I am paranoid to even yawn because I am afraid that the words I am speaking in my head will come out of my mouth.  I have never said any of these things out loud or whispered them or anything like that.  I am worried because a couple of times I did have my mouth open, like while I was yawning or something, and in my head, I said the words.  I have asked God over and over for forgiveness, and I talked to other christians about this, including a couple of pastors, and they have all told me that I have not committed this, and I am forgiven because I asked God to.  My problem is I can’t feel forgiven within myself.  I do not believe the things I said in my head, and I don’t want God to send me to hell.  Can you help me?

Sincerely,
Paranoid

Dear Paranoid,

The problem isn’t with whether or not you can be forgiven – the problem is that you don’t feel forgiven.  The two issues are very different.  You already agreed that many people have told you that what you have been doing isn’t the sin against the Holy Spirit (read “The Unpardonable Sin” to see what the blasphemy of the Holy Spirit really is).  There are times when our head and our heart aren’t on the same page.  Guilt can drive someone crazy if they don’t learn to keep things in proper perspective.  God says that your heart can be wrong.  You feel that you can’t be forgiven, but the Bible says you can.  It is very similar to the problem that the apostle Paul faced.  Paul had murdered christians and felt that he was the worst of the worst, but he learned that Jesus would forgive him (1 Tim 1:15-16).

The apostle John said it best, “By this we shall know that we are of the truth and reassure our heart before Him; for whenever our heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart, and He knows everything.” (1 Jhn 3:19-20).  Your act of faith is going to be letting go of your fears and trusting that living by God’s Word is what matters (Rom 10:17).  Sometimes, our feelings can be fickle and wrong, and we’ve got to ignore them until time and life change them.

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Is it necessary to change for the good, or would it be better to be accepted for who you are?

Sincerely,
Just Me

Dear Just Me,

When we change for the good, we uncover who we really are.  God tells us to purify our hearts and lives (Jas 4:8).  When you purify something, you take all of the dirt and pollutants out of it.  Sin is a disease that corrupts our lives and contaminates our souls (Gen 6:12).  When we grow in faith, our love increases (2 Thess 1:3), and our joy increases (Php 1:25).  Our lives improve as we purify them.

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I believe in God and believe He loves me and has a plan for me.  But what if that plan is for me to be miserable?  What if my loneliness and suffering serve His greater plan for the world?  Are there any Scriptures that say God wants us to have a good life?

Sincerely,
Down In The Mouth

Dear Down In The Mouth,

God’s plans for our lives may often involve trials and tribulations, but we can learn to have contentment in all circumstances.  Paul warned the early christians that God’s children will be besought with troubles (Acts 14:22).  However, no trial will ever come upon us that is too difficult to handle (1 Cor 10:13).  As we learn and grow, God promises that we can learn to be content in whatever situation we find ourselves in (Php 4:11-13).  God desires for us to love life and see good days (1 Pet 3:10).  This life is full of simple pleasures that are God’s gifts to us (Eccl 3:13).  There may be times when our trials seem never-ending, but remember… even Job eventually saw a happy ending to his tale (Job 42:12).

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This is sort of difficult.  It concerns my uncle, who, over the last few years, has… rediscovered his faith?  I suppose that works.  He’s completely changed his lifestyle, which isn’t a bad thing.  No smoking, no drinking.  Fantastic.  However, he’s also completely changed his personality.  He has a growing list of things he can’t watch, listen to, or say, all because he’s “christian”.  He’s become so… judgmental of everyone around him and is alienating his family.  I wasn’t under the impression that to be “christian” you had to give up everything in life that you enjoyed.  He doesn’t laugh anymore; at least, he doesn’t around us.  Can you give me any guidance on how to respect his faith and understand his choices?  He was always a good man… an EMT, police officer, husband, and father.  He’s always believed, but he also lived.  Now, it’s like he’s set himself, and everyone else, to standards that can’t be met.  And he’s very vocal with his views.  I just don’t understand him anymore.  Any advice or insight you could give would be greatly appreciated.

Sincerely,
Disheartened Niece

Dear Disheartened Niece,

There is a fine line between removing worldliness from our lives and secluding ourselves from life – it sounds like your uncle may be having trouble finding that balance.  Jesus clearly tells us to purify our hearts and minds (Jas 4:8).  However, we are also told to enjoy the wholesome blessings of this life (Eccl 3:13).  Christ lived a perfectly sinless life (Heb 4:15), and yet, he was often accused of being too friendly with the lost (Matt 11:19).

There is a balance between living in the world, but not being of the world (1 Cor 5:9-10).  If we remove ourselves from all society, we will never be able to reach those who so desperately need God’s Word (Mk 16:15).  We are warned against religion that finds its strength in self-deprecation (1 Tim 4:1-5).  Our strength should be found in the love of Christ (Jhn 3:16) and in His Word (Rom 10:17).  Hopefully, some of these verses might allow you to have a dialogue with your uncle.

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I’ve been married for over a decade and born again for that long also, but there is a sinful problem in my life.  I haven’t physically slept with anyone, but I struggle with flirting, porn, and putting myself in compromising situations.  I talked to many people (pastors, friends, etc., even my wife).  I still haven’t overcome it yet.  I exhausted these talks with my wife; it’s starting to bring her down, so now, I keep it to myself.  Is there any hope of freedom for me, or am I stuck this way for life?  If you can help me, write back, please.

Sincerely,
Enslaved

Dear Enslaved,

The Bible makes several statements about sexual sins and how to avoid them:

1. Flee fornication (1 Cor 6:18).  Keeping yourself out of compromising situations is a logistical decision.  Put accountability software like Covenant Eyes on your computer and only use it in a public area.  Stay away from social situations and places that are a temptation.  In short, don’t put yourself somewhere where you can make a bad decision.
2. Replace bad habits with good ones (Lk 11:24-26).  Make a decision to court and flirt with your wife.  Find joy in the wife of your youth (Pr 5:18).  Make it your personal campaign to rekindle the joy and happiness of your marriage.  Take all of that wasted energy and apply it to a godly romance.  Your current choices are destroying your wife and marriage… this will do the exact opposite.

These two habits are stressed over and over again in the Scriptures.  The last thing that we would recommend is what you are already doing.  By using this site and talking to others, you are surrounding yourself with good counsel (Pr 15:22).

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