What is the proper way to take the Lord’s Supper if you are taking it by yourself because usually I find that an elder is administering it after the service, and I thought proper verses were to be said while taking it?

Sincerely,
Solitary Contemplation

Dear Solitary Contemplation,

The Lord’s Supper isn’t intended to be taken alone.  Communion is intended to be taken on the first day of the week with the whole church (Acts 20:7Acts 20:7
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7 And upon the first day of the week, when we were gathered together to break bread, Paul discoursed with them, intending to depart on the morrow; and prolonged his speech until midnight.  

WP-Bible plugin).  In fact, the Corinthian church was condemned for not taking the Lord’s Supper in an orderly fashion (1 Cor 11:20-221 Cor 11:20-22
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20 When therefore ye assemble yourselves together, it is not possible to eat the Lord's supper: ²¹ for in your eating each one taketh before [other] his own supper; and one is hungry, and another is drunken. ²² What, have ye not houses to eat and to drink in? or despise ye the church of God, and put them to shame that have not? What shall I say to you? shall I praise you? In this I praise you not.  

WP-Bible plugin).  The solution to the disarray of the Corinthian church was for them to patiently wait for one another before taking the communion and to do it in an orderly fashion as a group (1 Cor 11:331 Cor 11:33
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33 Wherefore, my brethren, when ye come together to eat, wait one for another.  

WP-Bible plugin).

There are no specific verses that need to be said before taking the Lord’s Supper, but it is important that we reflect upon Christ’s death and examine ourselves before and while participating (1 Cor 11:26-291 Cor 11:26-29
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26 For as often as ye eat this bread, and drink the cup, ye proclaim the Lord's death till he come. ²⁷ Wherefore whosoever shall eat the bread or drink the cup of the Lord in an unworthy manner, shall be guilty of the body and the blood of the Lord. ²⁸ But let a man prove himself, and so let him eat of the bread, and drink of the cup. ²⁹ For he that eateth and drinketh, eateth and drinketh judgment unto himself, if he discern not the body.  

WP-Bible plugin).

I have been trying to get into the kingdom since I was five-years-old; I am now fifty-five.  My question is: am I wasting my time?  Can everyone get into God’s kingdom, or do you have to be pre-selected by God?

Sincerely,
Seeking Citizenship

Dear Seeking Citizenship,

Anyone can get into the kingdom of Christ – it happens when you become a christian.  Paul says that all christians have been transferred into Christ’s kingdom (Col 1:13Col 1:13
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13 who delivered us out of the power of darkness, and translated us into the kingdom of the Son of his love;  

WP-Bible plugin).  ‘Kingdom’ is another name for the church.  Jesus’ church is called His body (Col 1:18Col 1:18
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18 And he is the head of the body, the church: who is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead; that in all things he might have the preeminence.  

WP-Bible plugin), the house of God (1 Tim 3:151 Tim 3:15
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15 but if I tarry long, that thou mayest know how men ought to behave themselves in the house of God, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and ground of the truth.  

WP-Bible plugin), and the kingdom (Lk 17:20-21Lk 17:20-21
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20 And being asked by the Pharisees, when the kingdom of God cometh, he answered them and said, The kingdom of God cometh not with observation: ²¹ neither shall they say, Lo, here! or, There! for lo, the kingdom of God is within you.  

WP-Bible plugin).  Jesus’ kingdom is a spiritual kingdom (Jhn 18:36Jhn 18:36
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36 Jesus answered, My kingdom is not of this world: if my kingdom were of this world, then would my servants fight, that I should not be delivered to the Jews: but now is my kingdom not from hence.  

WP-Bible plugin), and you become a part of it when you are baptized (Gal 3:27Gal 3:27
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27 For as many of you as were baptized into Christ did put on Christ.  

WP-Bible plugin).  Read “What Must I Do To Be Saved?” to see what it takes to become a christian and enter Christ’s kingdom.

A youth pastor is going to different families in the church and saying that he thinks two particular teens are having a homosexual relationship.  He has not talked to the youths themselves or their parents.  What kind of action would you suggest be taken in regards to this youth pastor?

Sincerely,
Not A Gossip Girl

Dear Not A Gossip Girl,

Homosexuality is a sin (Rom 1:26-27Rom 1:26-27
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26 For this cause God gave them up unto vile passions: for their women changed the natural use into that which is against nature: ²⁷ and likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another, men with men working unseemliness, and receiving in themselves that recompense of their error which was due.  

WP-Bible plugin), and to slander someone with such an accusation is a heinous crime indeed.  We are never to gossip or slander people (Pr 10:18Pr 10:18
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18 He that hideth hatred is of lying lips; And he that uttereth a slander is a fool.  

WP-Bible plugin, 2 Tim 3:32 Tim 3:3
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3 without natural affection, implacable, slanderers, without self-control, fierce, no lovers of good,  

WP-Bible plugin).  The Scriptures teach that if we believe someone is living a sinful lifestyle, we should talk to them individually first before escalating the issue and exposing their sin to others (Matt 18:15-17Matt 18:15-17
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15 And if thy brother sin against thee, go, show him his fault between thee and him alone: if he hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. ¹⁶ But if he hear [thee] not, take with thee one or two more, that at the mouth of two witnesses or three every word may be established. ¹⁷ And if he refuse to hear them, tell it unto the church: and if he refuse to hear the church also, let him be unto thee as the Gentile and the publican.  

WP-Bible plugin).  There are multiple reasons for this:

1. You might be wrong and have misunderstood the situation.
2. Individual confrontation keeps a situation as private as possible and, therefore, allows people to save face.
3. It avoids gossip and making a situation larger than it needs to be.
4. God says to do it this way (most importantly!).

This “youth pastor” (that title alone tells us there are further problems at your congregation – we recommend you read “What’s In A Name?” and “Elders”) is completely wrong in not confronting the individuals personally.  If he is right, then their souls hang in the balance.  If he is wrong, then the situation could be corrected privately the way God intends.

(This question is a follow up to “Kudos To Who?”).

What I am talking about is a certain day that the church sets aside for the pastor.  Right now, we are asked to give one thousand dollars to the pastor for pastor appreciation, but in this particular church, you pay for everything that is done, and the leadership caters to groups who give that money, and others are left out.  I wanted to be a greeter in this church and was told that I couldn’t because I didn’t sign some type of contract and pledge to give every time they ask for something.  A thousand dollars is a lot of money for some, and I really don’t think that they are understanding what Christ’s church is all about.  If you have heard this before, then believe it because it is happening, and these people think they are right, and it saddens me to see people doing it, and nobody is doing anything about it.

Sincerely,
Hand On My Wallet

Dear Hand On My Wallet,

Wow!  Apparently there is big money in pastor “appreciation” day.  If only we all could get a thousand dollar gift from our friends and neighbors.  This sort of money-grubbing worldliness makes us sick… and it sickened Jesus too (Mk 12:38-40Mk 12:38-40
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38 And in his teaching he said, Beware of the scribes, who desire to walk in long robes, and [to have] salutations in the marketplaces, ³⁹ and chief seats in the synagogues, and chief places at feasts: ⁴⁰ they that devour widows' houses, and for a pretence make long prayers; these shall receive greater condemnation.  

WP-Bible plugin).  Heb 13:5Heb 13:5
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5 Be ye free from the love of money; content with such things as ye have: for himself hath said, I will in no wise fail thee, neither will I in any wise forsake thee.  

WP-Bible plugin teaches that everyone, and that includes church leaders, should be free from the love of money.  All sorts of evil comes from the love of money (1 Tim 6:101 Tim 6:10
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10 For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil: which some reaching after have been led astray from the faith, and have pierced themselves through with many sorrows.  

WP-Bible plugin), and a pastor is specifically forbidden to be a man who is a lover of money (1 Tim 3:2-31 Tim 3:2-3
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2 The bishop therefore must be without reproach, the husband of one wife, temperate, sober-minded, orderly, given to hospitality, apt to teach; ³ no brawler, no striker; but gentle, not contentious, no lover of money;  

WP-Bible plugin).

The church you are describing is a false church, and the best thing you can do is leave.  They are using the Gospel as a means of financial gain and power – a deplorable misuse of Christ’s message.  These wolves in sheep’s clothing have perverted the Bible for their own wicked gain (Acts 20:29-30Acts 20:29-30
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29 I know that after my departing grievous wolves shall enter in among you, not sparing the flock; ³⁰ and from among your own selves shall men arise, speaking perverse things, to draw away the disciples after them.  

WP-Bible plugin).  We recommend you read “Finding The Church” and start looking for a faithful congregation.  If you would like our help, feel free to e-mail us at askyourpreacher@mvchurchofchrist.org, and we will happily point you toward a faithful congregation in your area.

What does the Bible say about “pastor appreciation”?  Is there such a thing, or is it a man-made tradition that churches practice?

Sincerely,
A Little Too Much Gratitude

Dear A Little Too Much Gratitude,

We aren’t completely sure what you mean by “pastor appreciation”.  If you mean a certain day or month to commemorate those who serve as elders in the church… there is no Bible precedent for that.  The Bible never sets aside a specific way or time to show kindness to the eldership.  Heb 13:7Heb 13:7
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7 Remember them that had the rule over you, men that spake unto you the word of God; and considering the issue of their life, imitate their faith.  

WP-Bible plugin says that we should remember and imitate those who are over us in the church.  Heb 13:17Heb 13:17
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17 Obey them that have the rule over you, and submit [to them]: for they watch in behalf of your souls, as they that shall give account; that they may do this with joy, and not with grief: for this [were] unprofitable for you.  

WP-Bible plugin says that we should submit to the eldership, so their work can be a joy instead of a grief.

Elders have some of the loneliest and most difficult jobs on the planet.  The church eldership has the responsibility to watch over every soul in the congregation.  Elders see every problem, trouble, travail, and heartache that a church faces.  It is the least we can do to humbly show our appreciation for the work they have committed their lives to.  The Bible doesn’t tell us to set a day aside; it tells us to have an attitude of gratitude.

My wife is a member of a Baptist church.  I have never been a member at any church.  I hardly ever went, and if I did it was a different church every so often.  Her father is the pastor there.  I asked her the other day if maybe we could visit a different church and listen to some different preaching other than her father’s sometime.  I only asked if we could do this like once every three months or so.  She bluntly said, “NO!”  I asked why, and she said, “I’m a member of my church, and I won’t go anywhere else.”  I have to admit, this made me sort of upset.  What’s the Bible’s take on this????

Sincerely,
The Un-Baptist Son-In-Law

Dear The Un-Baptist Son-In-Law,

The Bible says that you must work out your own salvation with fear and trembling (Php 2:12Php 2:12
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12 So then, my beloved, even as ye have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling;  

WP-Bible plugin).  Regardless of your wife’s choices, you must make it a point to seek out and find the truth.  Not all churches are equal.  As we have said to people in other posts, denominationalism is wrong.  Baptist churches make Baptists, Lutheran churches make Lutherans, Catholic churches make Catholics, etc.  You want to find a church that teaches the Bible, not manmade doctrines.  There were no Baptists, Lutherans, Episcopalians, etc. in Christ’s day… and that should stand as a warning to us about the dangers of adding things that Christ never intended.  We shouldn’t add to God’s law nor subtract from it (Rev 22:18-19Rev 22:18-19
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18 I testify unto every man that heareth the words of the prophecy of this book, if any man shall add unto them, God shall add unto him the plagues which are written in this book: ¹⁹ and if any man shall take away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God shall take away his part from the tree of life, and out of the holy city, which are written in this book.  

WP-Bible plugin).  We recommend you read “All For One” for more information about the blight of denominationalism.

You are right to want to look around and search for the truth (Lk 11:9Lk 11:9
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9 And I say unto you, Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.  

WP-Bible plugin).  It is important that we worship God in a way that is both zealous and obedient to the truth (Jhn 4:24Jhn 4:24
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24 God is a Spirit: and they that worship him must worship in spirit and truth.  

WP-Bible plugin).  Visit around, ask questions, and test the preaching of various congregations (1 Jn 4:11 Jn 4:1
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4 ¹ Beloved, believe not every spirit, but prove the spirits, whether they are of God; because many false prophets are gone out into the world.  

WP-Bible plugin).  Make it your goal to find the truth… not simply a congregation that is enjoyable to visit.  Feel free to read “Finding A Church” and “Preacher Interrogation” to help arm yourself to ask the right questions and find a faithful congregation in your area.